Baby clothes inheritance plan is spoiled by sibling rivalry

October 3, 2016 GMT

Dear Abby:

I have a brother and a sister. My husband and I have a 3-year-old child and no plans for more children.

We have been blessed to be able to afford nice things for our daughter, and I have saved them in the hope of giving them to my brother and his fiancee, who are being married this year.

Now something unexpected has happened. My sister just announced that she’s engaged and is being married in three months. She plans on having children ASAP, whereas my brother and his fiancee want to wait a year or two.

My mom and my sister say whoever has a baby girl first is entitled to all my stuff, but I don’t want to give all my “treasures” to my sister. She wouldn’t appreciate them like my brother would. What should I do?

Feeling Coerced

Dear Feeling Coerced:

Cross your fingers and hope your sister’s production line produces all boys. (Just kidding.) Your baby items belong to you. No one is “entitled” to them. If you prefer to give them to your brother’s wife, that’s your privilege.

Dear Abby:

I’m 17 and have been in a relationship with “Zane” for three years. We get along beautifully, but of course we have our issues to work through. What upsets me is adults who think our relationship isn’t real because I’m under 18. No, Zane and I don’t have bills to pay or children to raise, but we talk to each other. That’s what I have always thought is the most important thing for a couple.

We have fun together, go to church and have meaningful discussions. The only thing my divorced parents agree on is that they both love Zane.

But I keep getting comments from teachers, my friends’ parents and even Zane’s grandma about how we should be prepared for our romance not to last because we’re so young. It’s annoying.

Seriously in Love in Maine

Dear Seriously in Love:

I don’t blame you for feeling frustrated because being patronized is annoying. The way to prove to “nonbelievers” that they are wrong is simply to continue successfully in your relationship. You appear to be mature, grounded and treat each other well. I don’t know what your plans are for after high school, but if you keep the lines of communication open, I see no reason why this couldn’t lead to marriage one day - and a good one, based on mutual respect and compromise.

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